50 Comments
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Tyler Goins's avatar

You beat the mid allegations every day

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lanie's avatar

for real, those people's definition of mid is VERY skewed... seems like our culture's beauty standards are raising everyday (or maybe just men's?)

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Tyler Goins's avatar

It's the worst of us (men). Just a bunch of sad incel boys trying to feel better about themselves.

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ikaikaonalani (she/they/ʻo ia)'s avatar

Just learned about what gooning is through this post.. I would say something but you already worded it perfectly, “there seems to be no no certainty in this life other than the cruelty of man…”

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anuhea's avatar

likeeeeee

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Meow's avatar

Your ex gooning to your friends made my stomach drop (and I gasped audibly).

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anuhea's avatar

you’d be surprised by how common and yet absurd this experience is

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neostephenism's avatar

it’s insane how many ppl do shit like this and go about their day like it’s nothing

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anuhea's avatar

FR.

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Mei-Ling Lin's avatar

Literalllyyy

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Kawehi Mahi-Roberts's avatar

it’s some scary stuff for sure

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anuhea's avatar

lol

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Costanza Polastri's avatar

I used to have a YouTube channel about quantum mechanics that got a bit of recognition at the end of 2019, when a video of mine got traction in the algorithm. In 2020, I made a video in which I asked people to stop commenting about my physical appearance, because I find it humiliating that in a video about Heisenberg’s Uncertainty Principle where my face is visible for less than 20 seconds, there’s comments about how fuckable I am. I stand by this take, because I am normal.

Incels in my country interpreted this video as me complaining that I am hot and complaining that men call me hot, even if I am “a 6/10 at best”. I received rape threats constantly for months. A big streamer in my country reacted to the video and I had people harassing me for months. “Response videos” were made in which dudes “debated my feminism”, making the batshit argument that commenting that I fuckable under a video about Hilbert’s Hotel is not sexist, because it’s “normal” and “men are biologically wired like this”.

I’m now over all of this, but it still hurts, because it’s painfully obvious that I didn’t deserve any of this, and yet no one believed it at the time. It’s painful to watch younger women, to see them be brilliant, funny, gorgeous, charismatic, charming, to see them being treated like shit by complete losers online, and to need so much time to realize that they deserve better.

I didn’t deserve this. You didn’t deserve this. These are as true as the fact that things fall to the ground and water flows downwards. I hope you never forget it, and I hope you speak your feelings as loud as you need, so that hopefully other women take less time to learn that they don’t deserve it either, when misogyny inevitably comes for them.

My email is costanza.polastri@gmail.com if you ever want to talk/vent to someone who gets it. This offer is open to everyone who relates to these experiences. Non of us deserves to feel as alone as I felt in 2020.

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lanie's avatar

well written, and also more heartbreaking than I expected. It's crazy how cruel the internet can be, internet culture is odd. I'm glad you at least had a positive takeaway at the end :,)

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anuhea's avatar

mahalo, lanie xx

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stevie's avatar

you have such a way with words, its so exciting to see you publishing your work

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anuhea's avatar

thank you for being here.

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Nyomi of the North's avatar

I’m so sorry this happened to you. People forget their humanity online. In the real world with real people who have real faces, you are a stunning woman inside and out. Those who have no depth are always the first to judge. The hypersexualization of women and the dehumanization/fetishization of our emotions is so disgusting. You deserved better and I bet you’ll have the last laugh.

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abbymallard's avatar

literally, those people (mostly men) are the definition of brainrot

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nikki's avatar

you have a beautiful mind :)

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anuhea's avatar

thank you sweet, nikki.

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❦ sonny p. forella's avatar

i'm sorry that happened to you, man. twitter was calling margot robbie mid, so i literally don't know what to say on that. oh wait, i do: men should be euthanised!!!

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Alma's avatar

this is an actual nightmare scenario to me. genuinely so sorry they did this to you. 💕

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anuhea's avatar

it’s ok i’m a writer now. so much love

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t ★'s avatar

you said this in such a beautiful, visceral way. i’m so sorry the internet did that to you.

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anuhea's avatar

you are wonderful

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Ellie M's avatar

Isn't hero hei like a terrible anti-sjw creepy anime alt right incel?

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anuhea's avatar

not surprised 😭😭😭

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Tree's avatar

I liked those tiktok videos

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Jane Roberts Shapiro's avatar

God this described my feelings so well, I didn’t go nearly viral as you but I had a video I made when I was 19 get a decent amount of views and I got an influx of comments telling me that I had a butter face, that the only thing going for me was my chest size, that I looked like Anne Frank, and hundreds of ‘mid’ comments. But at the same time I kept getting DMs of men asking me to do sex work, a boy from my highschool even said that I should do it, this is a rant now but I just wanted to say how much this post resonates with me, thank you for writing it.

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Aisha's avatar

Hero hei video used as a secondary source on internet history has me breaking out in hives

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CansaFis Foote's avatar

...internet culture breaks my brain...appreciate the humor in the entirety of all of this...and well done improving the world through it all...great read thank you...

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